Racing to my Redemption
by Imagi
Summary: Six NON Total Drama All Stars teens went to the mall looking for a break from the hotel tedium. The Seventh though had something far different planned. If Total Drama would NOT give him a real chance to compete, then Ezekiel would go elsewhere. Who cared if The Incredible Dash auditions were just for those 21 and older? He still had to try. Main characters official by chap 3.


**_Racing to my Redemption_**

* * *

**_Disclaimer:_** _Do not own Total Drama. Just a fan. Also don't own parody's of the Amazing Race again I do this for fun not for profit._

**_Imagi's Personal Disclaimer:_**I intend to finish all unfinished stories BUT without inspiration, no reviews, zero criticism and/or someone email poking me saying come on you can do it... it's just down to my mental willpower.:( And that took a huge hit thanks to a Jekyll and Hyde customer I lost my job over...and yes I had +10 witnesses saying otherwise. That combined with the latest Canon Zeke bashing and then a corrupted flash drive that held the last chapter of 23 The Road to TDR among other stories. X( Fortunately though I found a new job where I'm actually treated like a human. I've also slowly been locating most of the missing MS Word files that are more or less intact on my computer. :D So yeah…excuses, but…well I'll try to be a little more consistent though. ;)

**_My Characters: _**_The Bickertys, Tammertons,Timidtons Douglas and Madame Kristine are mine. Please ask if you wish to use._

**_Amazing Race Restrictions: _**_Before you ask Incredible Dash is a parody of Amazing Race so the rules of auditioning are different. No Casting Calls, no semi finalists nada. Just one incredibly long day filled with thousands of people of which a certain number of teams are picked. ;)_

**_Ratings: _**_Still no higher than Teen. No cursing, but there is a LOT of shouted bashing towards Ezekiel and Teens in the FIRST chapter only. _

**_Italics: _**_ If dialogue is in italics then its mental speak for every character except for Ezekiel. _

**_Ezekiel: _**_This takes place after Total Drama All Stars. Ezekiel will for most part not be speaking verbally. He will either think to himself or he will write responses inside a notebook. Both mental speak and notebook responses are in italics. _

**_Fan Cameos: _**_Sorry not this story. BUT I will let you guys vote for characters at the end okay? :)_

_That said enjoy my latest story okay? :) **(1.)**_

* * *

**Chapter 1: Jerktology Graduates? Ha! I'm a Total Drama Veteran!**

**Part One**

* * *

Toronto Mall

Late Afternoon

* * *

It was the day of the Incredible Dash Auditions. And unlike the previous US citizens only seasons, this season would feature six racers from the United States and six racers from Canada, the producers from Incredible Dash had proudly boasted.

And after months of waiting and speculation, the auditions had finally reached the Toronto Mall. And as expected the place was already jammed packed with wannabe millionaire hopefuls. While a few smiled and greeted other possible teams, the majority however were about as friendly as a rabid dog.

Each and everyone believed themselves to be the future winning team of the Incredible Dash and couples, brother/sister, best friends and so forth overzealously guarded their prize winning strategies with shopping bags, plastic tarps and their own ever loving hands.

Nothing was too over the top. After all even with the entry line closed from further entries, there were still thousands upon thousands of people with only six teams that would be chosen for the next season that very day. No one would take any chances.

Not even with the single oddball in the bunch. Even if the varying teams were to ignore the boy's short blue shaggy hair and his constant fixation with the lit mall ceiling as he sipped from a food court drink and the bright green shopping bag next to him one could ignore the fact that the oddity teenager was just that a TEENAGER.

And even though the rest of the possible future teams especially the black couple in front of the blue haired boy and a semi familiar shy brunette couple behind were willing to humor the quiet little kid that acted like he actually BELONGED in the large winding slow moving line they WEREN'T.

And as almost three dozen other would be racers had already learned what Jefferson Bickerty and the future Mrs. Tiffy Bickerty the soon to be world famous models wanted they would get. And all it took was a few kind observations of the other teams many shortcomings and a few casually innocent threats.

Wisely the thirty five other teams that were ahead of them quickly realized they were taking the Bickerty's precious time and evacuated the line. And the tears of joy and screams of delight in the ex team's eyes brought proud smiles to their faces.

The models smiles grew wider as they slowly but surely were making their way up to the odd freaky boy that was several line rows ahead of them as more and more of the now ex teams in front oh so kindly gave up their invaluable spots in front of them for their betters.

"Four dozen Jeffykins." Tiffy cooed out as her cold blue eyes locked on the teenager who was slowly approaching the first check point. That FREAK had no purpose in being in the GROWNUPS ONLY line and as future Incredible Dash contestants the Fabulously Fabulous Bicerty's would make sure he knew it.

* * *

_Toronto Mall_

_The Endless Winding Twisting why I haven't hurled yet I don't know Incredible Dash Line_

_Ezekiel's POV_

* * *

From early morning when the small hotel shuttle bus had dropped him and six other of the Total Drama Island contestants off at the mall, Total Drama's one and only homeschooler had been standing inside the incredibly long Incredible Dash line.

Back and Forth, Around and Around, Up and Down flights of stairs and then past the food court and then back to the line winding it was an Izzy approved nausea inducing nightmare of body heat, angry shouting, cries of idea theft and so forth.

**HEY! HEY! **

** WRONG LINE LITTLE FELLA!**

And then there were of course the endless amount of funny jerks.

**CREATE A CREATURE IS THAT WAY! HA HA!**

**HEY KID! 1 PLUS NONE DOESN'T EQUAL 2 YOU-**

Despite several taunts some of them censored from more than a few of the mean spirited couples over his so called cluelessness over both his age as well as his ability to count, Ezekiel Zutanan was not one to be underestimated. Let the fools blab. He knew exactly what he was doing. **(2.)**

**PRETTY PINK HORSIE DOLLIES ARE THAT WAY!**

**AND THE GO AROUND CHO CHOO TRAIN IS THAT WAY! HA HA HA!**

**TWO! NOT YOU! SAY IT WITH ME TWWWWOOO…**

And Ezekiel trusted his personal therapist/life coach, despite said therapist coming up with the imbecilic moronic idea that had brought one academically smart yet socially naive teenager into each and every one of the many circles of you know where during his time on the pit of despair that was so cheerfully called Total Drama.

And age or no age if there were two things that that demonic playground called a reality show had taught him was ratings equal power and fortune favors the brave, the clueless and the fool hearted. That and Total Drama teens gravitate to other Total Drama Teens. So in the end he should be fine.

That hardheaded determinedness had allowed him to meet fellow possible Incredible Dash contestants Billi and Bill Tammerton. The easy going dark skinned brother and sister animal caretakers were just that easy going.

**HEY CLUELESS TEENAGER! **

**THIS IS THE BIG BOY AND GIRL LINE!**

**HAVEN'T YOU HEARD? THERE'S AN AGE LIMIT! CHECK BACK IN 10 YEARS KID!**

Not to mention protective. Once the Tammertons had realized the source of taunts was over a lone teenager standing in line they just simply smiled and stepped aside allowing the terrible tempered twosomes to cut ahead of them until they reached the shaggy haired teenager with hair the color of blueberry pie.

It was one of the side effects from the medication he was taking to regrow his hair and to help undo the damage caused by one sadistic host. And Billi didn't blink an eye over the ever present protective black sunglasses, his still pale green skin or even his semi fanged mouth either. She just smiled.

"Just let the whiny babies go ahead of you. I and my brother won't be dealin with their tantrums over missing nappytime." Billi winked moving aside once more allowing yet another snooty couple pass the motion causing her long beaded braids to clink together cheerfully.

Half covered behind his shaggy bangs and hidden behind sunglasses, grey eyes still tinted with red blinked in confusion. Just as quickly he blinked again as the ever winding line started to approach the food court line for the second time. And the now blue haired teen frowned as he remembered something important.

_"Roight..foorgot to get doctoors order drink eh."_ No sooner had he started to move from the line was he stopped by one Bill Tammerton who silently looked down at the Total Drama outcast with gentle yet expectant eyes.

Now that he thought about it with a much clearer mental state he reminded him of Total Drama Season 4 contestant B. After several moments of silence finally Zeke relented to the power of kindness that was shown to one who normally received none.

"Doc..tor…Root Beer." The homeschooler naturally winced at the broken, rough and growly words that came out of his mouth, even though it was by far better an improvement over speaking nothing but snarls and animal speech.

Once again neither Tammerton blinked an eye. Bill quietly left the line of teams for the Food Court and not long after returned with his medically proscribed Root Beer soda as well as yet another Incredible Dash hopeful pair.

Susie Timidton, a meek librarian and Samson Timidton her equally shy website designer husband had had the misfortune of being one of the many ousted teams to encounter the demon couple and despite the Tammerton's gentle reassurances, both of the Timidton's were terrified.

"If the Bickerty's see us in line again…it's going to be bad bad bad!" Susie chirped out the short haired brunette shaking like a leaf which Samson echoed. "You know thanks for your valued assistance Bill, but I think its best if Susie and I-" Needless to say the Tammertons's were very persuasive.

_"That had been an hour and a half ago." _ Zeke stated to himself in amusement as the Quintet of misfits finally approached the first of the many Incredible Dash check in points an empty store which was undoubtedly packed with waiting people.

"We only need one more team for Checkpoint One! All other Incredible Dash applicants please continue onwards until you reach the next Checkpoint and wait for further instructions!" The staff member guarding the line exit explained via bullhorn.

It took a gentle firm push from the Tammertons and a pair of thumbs ups as well a fanged grin from him to get the timid Timidtons to move a step forward to the waiting staff member. And even then Susie and Samson hesitated and shook violently.

"Good..Luck…Sus…sus..and San.." Once again Ezekiel winced at the brokenness of his words, but he firmly continued. "Get..on..show..bull..bull..es…go…GO!" The shout combined with an animalistic growl was enough to get the pair to scream and dart forward into the building.

Ignoring the surprised looks from staff members and other teams the recovering teen calmly followed the Tammertons onwards to the next checkpoint with his eyes once again glued skyward as he thought peaceful thoughts. Oddly enough when he ignored the ever present taunts he thought he heard cries of pure anguish and heartbreak…

* * *

Toronto Mall

Create a Creature Store

LeShawna's POV

* * *

"AND STAY OUT!" The friendly neighborhood Create a Creature worker screamed out shutting the door to the happy stuffed animal friendly wonderland shut to deal with the carnage left within. The sassy sister blinked in shock before she turned her attention onto her companions.

Her Sugar Baby holding a light blue My Little Horsies plush unicorn with a moon symbol and a starry wand with one hand and the enormous pile of Create a Creature boxes at his feet was venomously arguing with Izzy.

Izzy of course was in the midst of the 50+ Create a Creature box pile cuddling happily with her own My Little Horsies plush this one bright pink with a trio of balloons ignoring Harold all while balancing a butter yellow pony plush with butterfly markings on top of her head.

**I don't like Sparkle Butt as a winged princess horsie either, but GOSH! I can't believe you did that!**

**Izzy corrected a mistake! And got her Happy Pinkie! Happy Happy Pinkie makes Izzy happy and so does Shy Butter who Izzy is balancing on her head! **

LeShawna shook her head in exasperation at the pair. "Mental note to self…Don't let Izzy and Harold in Create a Creature together again...EVER." She then scowled at the heap of over 50 boxes each filed with various pony plushies.

**Izzy you mutilated the Sparkle Butt My little Horsie plush right in front of a little girl's party GOSH!**

**Birthday girl said Sparkle Butt is a unicorn and she's right! If the evil corporation is putting wings on a plush that clearly makes the plushie look fake and that Izzy can easily rip off with her thumb and pinkie then its Izzy's duty to remove them!**

"And most importantly on Mall Sign up Days don't ever ask a hotel full of staff and Total Drama teens if they want anything from the mall again EVER. And that goes triple if there's a Create a Creature nearby." LeShawna pledged to herself.

**And make a necklace of them?**

At Harold's last comment the sister quickly turned her attention on the unpredictable red head who sure enough was wearing a new necklace which was suspiciously made from a series of purple iridescent wings. She then buried her face in her hands. "Scratch that. Lil Shawnie is not even going in any store that sells My Little Horsie toys."

**I mean….GOSH! If we hadn't gotten your Happy Pinkie and Shy Butter, my Lula Trixie and Dash Light both who are highly misunderstood but AWESOME Horsies, LeShawna's surprise Horsie…**

_"My what now?!"_

**And of course the many horsies that we were requested to bring back to the hotel with us including of course Chef's you better get me my Crosseyed pony who brings me great joy or ELSE plush then…GOSH!**

LeShawna blinked and groaned. "Right. And don't ever times infinity do the first two AND insult the Create a Creature staff to the point where they won't even help you get boxes full of my Little Horsie animals out to the stupid bus!" She growled under her breath as both Red heads continued to argue.

**Blah blah Ha Ha! Izzy DID pay and now Sparkle Butt unicorns free for every girl and boy!**

**But Chef also wanted a Princess Sparkle Butt…**

**SPARKLE BUTT'S A UNICORN! Fishcakes and Ketchup! Ha Ha! Porcupines! Sparkle Butt unicorns free for every girl and boy!**

LeShawna looked up just in time to see the wild red head cheer happily as she bounced to her feet still balancing the pony on her head, but she left her pink pony toy on the ground. "Uhh..Izzy you-"

"Wait for it..." Izzy said cheerfully holding her arms out. And sure enough a beat later the Happy Pinkie plush bounced into a happy Izzy's arms causing the bootylicious sister to do a double take especially seeing the inanimate plush close her eyes and smile happily.

"How the! Am I seeing what I THINK I just saw?!" Izzy and the plush both their heads to look at her and after a long long pause from one stunned chocolate goddess..."Never mind. Forget it. Let's just get out of here before we get arrested for winged pony mutilation."

"Sparkle Butt is a Unicorn!" **(3.)** Izzy yelled out before she skipped away happily clutching her new horsie plushie. "Izzy's off to see the Noah! The Noah of Books yes she does!" The crazy girl sang happily heading vaguely in the direction of the bookstore. **(4.)**

As the red head vaulted over a long line of angry Incredible Dash possible contestants, LeShawna rolled her eyes and knelt down to pick up one of many Create a Creature boxes. "No way is Little Shawnie going on a lost Izzy in the mall hunt! Come on Harold!"

With that the sassy sister was off barging through the Incredible Dash line in hopes of keeping Total Drama's most energetically unstable teen in sight…and leaving one glasses wearing red head behind with the Create a Creature boxes to play catch up.

"Wait my Chocolate Goddess! What about the Horsies! And you forgot your DJ pony…that was supposed to be a surprise…GOSH!"

* * *

_Toronto Mall_

_The Endless Winding Twisting Incredible Dash Line Checkpoint 5_

_Ezekiel's POV_

* * *

Forty minutes had passed before the approval to enter the fifth of the Incredible Dash's checkpoints was given. The Tammertons promptly stepped aside letting the crowd of people surge past them just like they had done the previous three checkpoints.

And while the blue haired teenager was touched by the caretakers' kindness and loyalty, it was by far time to put his foot on the ground. Right before a pair of snobbish blondes in designer clothes could shove past, the sole teenager stepped next to the Tammertons effectively blocking the path forward.

Then he proceeded to address his line friends with ever improving yet still broken words. "GO…whis…w…in…ot..Show…them…them..LUCK!" Ezekiel grinned before with a gentle yet firm push the Tammertons were through.

Waving to the kind brother and sister who smiled and waved back as Checkpoint 5 closed behind them, Zeke smiled happily showing off his fangs as the next staff member directed him onwards to the next Checkpoint.

* * *

As the SLOW teen in front of them blocked their path to THEIR CHECKPOINT it took all the Bickerty's had NOT to ruin their perfect manicures by putting their private personal kick boxer's training to good use. If only the Incredible Dash staff wasn't watching! How they would teach that BOY a lesson he wouldn't forget!

Gritting their perfectly white teeth together, the Bickerty Team impatiently waited for the clueless teen to say his pathetic goodbyes before THEIR CHECKPOINT was closed and they were directed behind that blue haired nitwit to the next one.

That Foolhearted Teen! How DARE HOW DARE HE make the JEFFERSON Bickerty and the future Mrs. TIFFY Bickerty wait! And like the other five dozen teams who foolishly wanted to deny them from their DIVINE placement on the Incredible Dash so would that boy learn.

**HEY STUPID!**

* * *

Toronto Mall

Wonderland Bookstore

Noah's POV

* * *

Surrounded by countless works of literature, Total Drama's sarcastic bookworm was contently relaxing in one of the book store's couches as he peacefully read his newest acquisition. At his feet was another bag full of newly purchased books.

The rest however…well good thing he had the hotel bus on speed dial in case of possible multiple purchases. And he wasn't the only one. "Stuck at the hotel or not there are only so many times you can read the same stories. Thank you Sunridge hotel staff for your first come first served limited Mall signup sheet days." Noah sighed happily as his phone rang.

Shortly after he was leading a Wonderland staff worker wheeling a dolly to the waiting hotel bus. A mass amount of book purchases warrants special treatment after all. With his books secured, the know-it-all was more than ready to board the bus back to the hotel. He had books to read.

An oof next to him caused the bookworm to look up. Not surprisingly Eva, Total Drama's iron woman was standing their holding her ever present weights. Next to her was her own staff worker. Unlike Eva the worker from U R Strong looked ready to collapse.

"Let me guess…more weights." Noah deadpanned without looking up. "You try sharing a gym with Lightning Shaclueless, Tyler Hurtshimself, Multiple boy, Jo my so called wanna be evil twin and Stacie my great grandpa invented weights." Eva grunted.

"Have to pass on that one." Flipping a page of his book the sound of audible growling caused him to look up. "You know patience is a virtue. Growling at the guy won't load your weights onto the bus any faster."

**"GRRRRR!"**

**"AHHH!"**

Glancing up from his book, Noah saw the U R Strong associate let out a high pitched scream before he proceeded to climb up a nearby lamppost in hopes of getting as far away from the raven haired strong girl as possible. "Correction, you'll just scare the poor guy up a lamppost."

**You want to join him egghead?! **

* * *

_Toronto Mall_

_The Endless Incredible Dash Line_

_Ezekiel's POV_

* * *

There was only ten minutes left before Checkpoint 6 would open, but already the demon couple behind him was doing their best to get him thrown out of the line. And though the insults progressively got worse he was NOT gonna budge for the Heather couple.

_"Give me yoor best shoot eh! You may have upset my loine buddies boot yoor noot gonna upset me! Noot gonna upset me…noot goona upset me" _The former Chris McClean made creature thought to himself as he steadfastly ignored the callous taunts from the Heather couple standing directly behind him.

**STUPID! STUPID! STUPID!**

Fighting the urge to snarl and bare his still semi fanged mouth, the homeschooler instead took a deep long sip from his medically proscribed Root Beer. Like pineapple juice the sweet yet fizzy drink had done wonders for his mental rehabilitation. Much to one Chris McClean's displeasure which is why he banned-

**STUPID! STUPID! HEY STUPID!**

* * *

Toronto Mall

Surfer's Sanctuary Surf Shack

Bridgette's POV

* * *

"Yeah…custom surfboard, yellow with long red spots on both sides?" The guy at the counter drawled. Bridgette gasped. "No way! You mean?!l" Taking her excited bouncing as a yes, the Surf Shack worker left briefly for the back room and returned with…

The surfer girl was not ashamed to admit that she hugged the poor guy and thanked him profusely, but after Chris McClean had used her beloved surfboard for a challenge in Season 2 without asking and Owen broke it could you blame her?

And even then he tried to get out of replacing it, but in the end the sadistic narcissist relented. Too bad for him THIS peaceful blonde wasn't going to settle for a surfboard sized cutout of a surfboard with Chris McClean's face on it. Or a spot on the next prerigged season of Total Drama.

To help bring the point home she had gotten her beloved Geoffy to help who in turn recruited his buddies Duncan and DJ who eventually had persuaded both Eva and Chef for their assistance in persuading Chris of his folly.

It had only taken a single hour before the sadist caved. And via phone call she had finally tasted victory. "SHE'S GETTING HER STUPID SURFBOARD! NOW GIVE ME BACK MY HAIRGEL!" Chris McClean screamed to the people on his side of the phone before he cleared his throat.

"Riight…talking to surfer girl what's her name…oh who cares! Anyway surfer girl your surfboard was custom ordered, yada yada rush job whatever! Just sign up for the next Hotel Mall sign up thingy at the dinky place you call a hotel and then go to the surf shop there to pick it up."

Smiling at the memory, she held her hands out to receive her long awaited custom copy of her beloved surfboard. "You have no idea how much this means to me. Thank you! Thank you very much!" Bridgette said cheerfully as she walked back out the door to the mall.

And in true Bridgette fashion she tripped on her sneakers and almost crashed headlong into a long line of people waiting for something. Needless to say they weren't pleased. "Oops sorry!" She called sheepishly before quickly leaving the area.

Unfortunately for her, the line wound every which way and for a girl holding a surfboard getting past was no easy task. "Sorry, excuse me… if you just…sorry didn't see that shark prop there…could you please just show me the way to the exit? Please…just show me the exit and I'll out of your hair…"

**AS IF! DO YOU REALIZE HOW LONG WE'VE BEEN STANDING HERE LITTLE GIRL?!**

**YOU JUST WANT US TO BLOW OUR CHANCES!**

**HA! WE'RE FUTURE INCREDIBLE DASH CONTESTANTS! YOU BETTER BELIEVE WE'RE NOT BUDGING!**

Nothing seemed to get through to the furious groups of people. And after several minutes of constant dodging, ducking and weaving around the tightly packed line one very exasperated surfer girl finally found a safe area.

**I hope you DON'T get on that show then! GOSH!**

Bridgette quickly looked up and sure enough spotted the lanky male slowly making his way out of that nightmarish line. Strangely enough Harold was holding a blue colorful unicorn to his chest with one arm while both his hands were full of Create a Creature boxes.

Adding to the strangeness, was an army's worth of plush boxes at his feet that the taller teen was slowly shuffling along at a snail's pace. Feeling sorry for him, she moved in to assist. Setting her new surfboard carefully on a nearby bench, she then proceeded to pick up the many boxes gaining Harold's attention.

"Hey! I spent more than several hours at Create a Creature today having over 50 My Little Horsies plushies stuffed in one of each of the ten different varieties and if I lose ANY of Chef's horsies especially the cross eyed pony it won't be…Oh hi Bridgette. Hey do you mind giving me a hand here?"

Smiling as she shook her head, the blonde reached for more of the boxes a proceeded to pile them on her surfboard and around the bench. With the plush secured for the moment Harold sank down on the other bench.

"Thanks. Keeping track of all fifty seven different Create a Creature boxes by yourself minus the box my lovely LeShawna took with her as she chased after Izzy is no easy task. And with My Little Horsies special horsie weekend at Create a Creature and that crazy Incredible Dash line full of ignoramuses-"

"I get it Harold." Bridgette smiled as she pulled out her cell phone and dialed. "Hello Sunridge Hotel Bus? This is Bridgette. One of your passengers? Yeah. If you could Harold and I could use a little help in getting a surfboard and a LOT of Create a Creature boxes out to the bus. Where are we? Well-"

* * *

_Toronto Mall_

_The Endless Winding Twisting Incredible Dash Line Checkpoint 6_

_Ezekiel's POV_

* * *

To say Zeke was starting to get nervous was an understatement. Here he was at the very head of the Incredible Dash line about to be let into Checkpoint 6 and he still hadn't seen any of the other Total Drama teens.

And without the other teens, everything that he had planned for would fall apart. And the thought of another taste of failure made him sick to his stomach. Briefly he thought about just moving aside and allowing the couple behind him to go first.

**STUPID! *WHISTLE* *WHISTLE* HERE STUPID! HERE BOY!**

And then he remembered he had the world's most demonic couple standing behind him. And after they tauntingly bragged about the five dozen other teams who gave up their spots for their "betters" he had to stay put. Defending the weak and helpless was after all another lesson his parents taught him.

_"Doon't attack them foor being idioots…Feral Zeke does noot get Root Beer Real Zeke does….Real Zeke smiles and doesn't speak cause everyboody HATES him when he does and all joost foor-"_ The sound of his straw hitting ice brought him back to reality. And so did the demon couple behind him.

**STUPID! *WHISTLE* *WHISTLE* HERE STUPID! HERE BOY!**

Grinding his fanged teeth together, Ezekiel Zutanan crunched his empty drink cup in one hand and then tossed it into a trash bag a waiting staff member held. And then he had to force down the thought of violently attacking the model blondes who now whistled and cheered mockingly.

**GOOD BOY! YOU USED THE TRASH CAN! LITTLE STUPID! NOW BARK FOR YOUR TREAT! BARK BARK BOY!**

_"Stay tuff…doon't attack them…stay tuff! If you doon't they'll hurt others eh!"_ He firmly coached himself while mentally praying for something positive to happen before he did something he would regret. And then it happened.

"Attention Incredible Dash applicants! Due to a small confusion on our part, Checkpoint 5 was packed beyond fire code regulations for the building. The overflow of contestants will now be heading to Checkpoint 6. Those of you still waiting please continue on to-"

Ignoring the montage of vulgar words coming from the demon couple over the staff worker's announcement, Zeke quickly darted down the line towards the very last available checkpoint. Even it was only a couple seconds, a break away from the horrific blondes would be a godsend.

Arriving at Checkpoint 7 he blinked in surprise at its location_. "Hours of gooing all around the mall and I end up roight at the door I came in at with yet another waiting toime. Come on other teens that I still barely knoo yoor names…come on…"_

**BARK LITTLE STUPID! BARK BARK BOY!**

**FREAKY BOY! STUPID STUPID FREAKY! FREAKY EEL! FREAKY EEL! **

_"FREAKIEL?! FREAKIEL?!"_

* * *

It had taken many taunts. All involving different species of animals and the child's intelligent. And they progressively got worse after that THING had FORCED them FORCED them to WAIT for not one, not two, but THREE THREE! CHECKPOINTS!

JEFFERSON Bickerty and the future Mrs. TIFFY Bickerty did not have TIME to deal with this this CHILD! And after that MESS that BOY had put them through they upped the ante. All it would take is one stray punch and away the child would go with the wonderful policeman in handcuffs. A just punishment.

After all they were his BETTERS. The Bickerty couple thought they had hit the target with the constant Dog taunts, but seeing the child in front of them jerk violently and clench his fist, the model couple knew they had finally hit the bullseye.

"Blood in the water Jeffykins." Tiffy cooed to her fiancé as she gently patted her perfect blonde ringlets. Her faultless blonde mate similarly smirked.

It was time to end this charade.

**FREAKY EEL! FREAKY EEL!**

* * *

Toronto Mall Outside

Sunridge Hotel Bus

Izzy's POV

* * *

Hanging upside by her ankle as Eva carried her outside; Izzy contently cuddled her pink horsie plush. Climbing inside the bus the strong woman then let her go. To her delight the bus seat was even more bouncy when you bounce on it upside down!

"Wheeee!" The red head cheered happily watching as Noah, Harold, Bridgette, and finally LeShawna entered the bus. It was then that her Happy Pinkie plush reminded her of her fellow passenger Izzy version checklist complete with big green checkmarks.

"Let's see…Bridgey has her surfboard and her smoochy bear's party supplies…"

**IZZY!**

"Check! Eva has her new weights… Check! Noah has boxes of books with his nose buried in one…Check! Izzy has her Happy Pinkie Plush?" Looking down at her Happy Pinkie plush holding up a big green checkmark Izzy grinned.

"Check!"

LeShawna who was sitting right across from her with wide eyes just finally shook her head. "You know what? I'm just gonna pretend I didn't see that. "That's the spirit! Here have a cupcake!" Izzy announced happily as her plush held out a cupcake to the startled sister.

"Okay LeShawna has her cupcake, her magazines and bags of clothes and-"

"What did I say about going though my things white girl?!"

"And Harold has each and every one of the fifty seven boxes all full of the My Little Horsies that the hotel workers wanted along with…" Izzy paused to take a deep breath. "AnneMariaOwenBethCodyDawnScottZoeySvetlanaDJStaciVitoBrickManitobaScottCourtneyLindsay-"

"I think we got it Izzy. Noah deadpanned turning the page in his book. "But don't you want your magic unicorn plushie Noah?" The red head grinned widely as the bookworm slammed his book shut his eyes wide. "Izzy!"

Giggling, Izzy moved her name to the last name on her list only to have it snatched away by an annoyed Eva. "We're all here; we have everything let's get going already!"

Izzy snatched it back. "And last, but not least Zekey has….Zekey has…you know I don't think he got anything today."

"Speaking of Ezekiel…where is that boy anyway?" LeShawna stated looking around. Eva looked through the crowded back of the bus and threw Create a Creature boxes everywhere to Harold's horror. Noah on the other hand rolled his eyes.

"Great. We get Izzy corralled and we're missing the Hotel Staff's little buddy. Yeah that wouldn't be good." It was high time for Izzy to correct her smart little buddy bookworm. "Oh he's not lost! Izzy saw him standing in the Incredible Dash Line!" The fun loving girl exclaimed as she played with Happy Pinkie.

*Pause*

*Pause*

**Izzy girl are you SERIOUS?**

**I KNEW that boy had his brain cells addled by toxic waste, but Incredible Dash?!**

**Everybody on that show is at least years older than us YEARS!**

**Actually according to Incredible Dash stats the minimum age requirement is 21 yrs.**** (5.)**

As the continued comments of skepticism kept on coming, Izzy ignored them. However Happy Pinkie was a different story. Unused to the Total Drama teens usual drama filled antics, the mare's mane straightened and the bright pink plush faded to a pale pink.

Izzy knew she had to act. And so she did. "QUIET!" Overlooking the silent bus, the wild and crazy girl continued. "You might not know Zekey, but Izzy KNOWS Zekey! And Izzy's Zekey is SMART! Something YOU would know if you got to know him instead of just instantly kicking him off in Seasons 1 and 3."

Flipping off the bus seat and landing on her feet with Happy Pinkie in her arms she continued. "And if Zekey is standing in that long long line then Zekey has found a way! And IzzyEscopeExposivoEsquireBrainzillaSaneson is gonna help! NEEEAH!" Izzy stuck out her tongue before cheerfully leaving the still stunned bus and darting back inside the mall.** (6.)**

No sooner than she did so did she hear it.

**FREAKY EEL! FREAKY EEL!**

Izzy's head snapped up and she snarled. Bolting forward she concentrated on the direction the insults were coming from.

**FREAKY EEL! FREAKY EEL!**

Karma, Leprechaun Luck, whatever! Zeroing in on the insults, she spotted her now blue haired Izzy friend standing several feet in front of her at the very head of the Incredible Dash line with his body shaking from suppressed fury. And that STUPID ugly couple behind them was making it worse!

**FREAKY EEL! FREAKY EEL!**

"_Time was up. Izzy goes now!"_

* * *

**FADE TO BLACK AND THEN GO TO COMMERCIAL. :D**

* * *

Imagi's Ramblings.

I decided after I typed ohhh about 30 pages which was about 12,000 words and counting...it might make sense to split the first chapter up some. ^^; On the plus side it means I updated faster! ;) And yeah…no voting yet. Remember I did split up part one. ;)

And as for the little black numbers in bold in here's the facts. ;)

1. Imagi is a Muppet Fan. That okay at the end is pure Pepe the King Prawn! :D

2. Once again Zutanan is my fanon last name for Zeke.

3. Let me make this clear 80's child. If my generation hated MLP there would be no Trixie, Pinkie Pie, Lightning Dust, Fluttershy, Derpy, Vinyl Scratch or Twilight Sparkle now. So no dissing 1st season alright? ;) Imagi agrees with Izzy and Pinkie Pie plushes have magic powers. Nuff said.

4. Wizard Oz reference if you missed it. ;)

5. 21 IS actually the requirement age for the Amazing Race.

6. While all of Izzy's names are Canon her last name of Saneson is not. That comes from my stories. ;)

That said I hope you enjoyed the first part of Chapter One. As always thanks to my readers who continue to read, reply and favorite my stories I appreciate it! :D

Imagi


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